There are many types of people in this world. We all come across a fair share of different personalities on a day to day basis. But sometimes, it gets a little harder to deal with ones who are manipulative and domineering. We can’t change other people, but what we CAN do is change ourselves in order to deal with people like that. It is important to know what to do before it is too late, and it is imperative to make sure we deal with them wisely.
How to identify a manipulative and domineering person?
These people are masters at the art of deception. Their true self is often covered with a facade in an attempt of being more likeable and approachable. A manipulator and a dominator will not understand the simple concept of having boundaries. When they want something, they will pursue it, regardless of who they hurt along the way. They will prey and feed on your fears, insecurities and emotional sensitivity. More often than not, these are our soft spots. They hook onto these and make you feel inferior to them. They are arrogant and bossy, and make you agree to things you wouldn’t want to agree to.
Imagine having two friends, let’s name them A and B. A goes and tells B that you said something negative about B. A also comes and tells you that B said something negative about you. But IRL, none of this happens. This creation of bad blood between two people is called triangulation, which is something manipulators and dominators are good at doing. They cause rivalry and jealousy between people for their personal interests.
So, how to deal with them wisely?
Take responsibility of yourself
Ever heard of the quote “Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.” Have enough self-respect to walk away from them. Take responsibility for your actions. Don’t trust the same person over and over again. Be aware of their presence and their attempts. Usually, these people take advantage of your kindness and niceness. It often ends up in you helping them with something, which forces you to have a relationship with them. Be accountable and don’t blame them for your loss. Learn from your mistakes and cut them out before it’s too late.
Reinforce your boundaries
With manipulating and domineering people, it is important to reinforce your boundaries. Keep reinforcing it and make sure they know. Stop being a part of their script. Your relationship with manipulating and domineering people is usually a toxic one. Distance and boundaries is imperative. The more powerful their force, the tighter your boundary must be. Don’t be afraid of cutting them out.
Question their safety
Typically manipulative and domineering people are dangerous; psychologically, verbally or physically. Ask yourself if it is safe to confront them. Try to assume the outcome of the situation. How will they react, what will they say, or what will they do? Don’t be afraid to talk to someone or seek help.
After you stop playing on with their tactics, there are many outcomes that you should expect. The one we all hope for is that they might realise what they were doing was wrong, and might stop. There might be no more manipulating. They also might become a worse version of themselves, but don’t get affected by it. Cut them out for good, so you won’t have to deal with that later on.